Memories of a Little Girl

Almost two weeks ago (this coming monday), my grandpa was diagnosed with Lukemia. Exactly a week to the day he was diagnosed, he died. I was fortunate enough to spend the last few days with him. Sitting with him. Caring for him. And loving him.

 For the past 30something years, I have walked through the same front door. Welcomed by the same warm greeting of two very anxious grandparents. Everything was always the same. And after awhile....it became comfortable. You knew you were at grandma and grandpa's when you looked around. And nothing had changed.

 I don't know what it was that caught my eye as a little girl, but these pictures....are what I would spend, time after time, visit after visit, looking at.

 These crystals have intrigued many children. Including my own. All with a little bit of sunlight and a slight twist of the wrist to send them spinning as tiny rainbows raced across the walls and carpet.

 I know their wedding picture never moved an inch. And I remember looking at it. But it wasn't until recently that I REALLY looked at it. They were a gorgeous couple! When before...as a child....they weren't "grandpa and grandma" in it. So it was kind of irrelevant to the little me. The picture next to it....was.

 Of course....they always had a place to sit. But back when...there were cow hides that would flap in the back as the chair was rocked.

 Grandma's collection. Little denim kids. This is but a fraction of what she had.

 I remember playing with these old magnets. Each bottle and all three bears come out.

When we arrived late at night, these stairs would loom above me as we were sent straight to bed. I was scared to climb them and scared to come down them. So I would slide down them. I really didn't want to fall down them. The carpet was/is velvety smooth, which made it easier.

 Another, always there, but never thought anything of it. I realized this last trip that it just may be a souvenier my dad brought back from Mexico on his mission. Never asked him about it. Maybe I will now.

 Same bed. Same rug. Same chair. Same mirror and light.

 We, girls, stayed in this room. Never appreciated the pictures till this trip.

Looking out the window to the back yard. That long wooden walkway made the most distinct sound when grandpa's quick abrupt step walked along it, with his cowboy boots.

Now that they are both gone, I realize that this will all fade away and never be the same. It's hard to choke that realization down and I'm grateful for what it brought into my life all these years.

I've missed my grandma. I already miss my grandpa. And I will miss all of this.

*Alisha has pictures of my grandparents on her blog that she put together. Check it out, if you'd like.