Rambles

Just love it when Internet is knocked out for a long time. But not really. Not that I had anything to blog about anyways. I haven't really taken very many pictures lately. I did a cake here and some cookies there, but nothing worth immortallizing with blogger.

Tidbits...I guess I could report that Mykael and Jaden went to go live with their mom. It was a mutual agreement between all parents and the two kids. I miss them terribly!!! In just the few short weeks that they've been gone, I feel like I've lost the connection I had with them through the 9 years they've been in my life. I dont doubt B's ability to raise them into great people, but as a parent, it's hard to let a child go even knowing it was for the best. Everything changed SO FAST! But they're happy and so I'm happy for them!

My 9 yr wedding anniversary came and went. We didn't really do anything. No presents. No date night. Just the same daily/nightly routine with the boys. Which is how I wanted it. 9 years. Seems like a long time. But hindsight, it flew.

Which reminds me that I'm "flying by" too. I used to be so young. How did I get so old. 32. 32. 32. 32. 32.32. maybe if I say it enough, I'll accept it. And yet I find myself drawn to the commercials and ads for "age defying" products. "Reverse the signs of aging". Good grief. I think now would be a good time to rid my home of mirrors because I would be perfectly content to just throw my hair up in a pony.
I was walking through the store, looking for a good multivitamin. (next I'll be buying a pill box for a week.) and meandered through hair care and stopped at the hair color. I gazed at all the different colors and thought, "What the heck? Why not"? SO I grabbed two boxes and went home. I really didn't think it through and messing with hair color wasn't wise. I attempted to go lighter/blonder. But it turned out more, yellow. It looks ok, but walking past a mirror, I find my self hesitate, sigh, and then keep walking. Oh well. It is what it is.

I'm on a quest. A quiet and personal one. Seeking truth and finding happiness. What IS truth? What IS happiness? Why is it so important for me right now in my life? Where is it going to take me? I haven't really come up with anything satisifying but if I don't question it, how will I know for sure. *This doesn't mean I'm going to jump off a cliff. Incase any of you think that.*

Well I'm going to try to sleep. Although that has become as illusive as being 21 again.
nighty night!